I haven't written in a very long time because I never know what to say. I am not one that is good about talking about herself, it makes me feel selfish or self centered. I don't have any kids to talk about and well, most of the time I wonder if anyone even cares what I have to say.
This end of last year and the beginning of this year was a roller coaster ride to say the least! Christmas was fabulous, one of the best I think I've ever had. On the 31st we went snowmobiling up to our brother in laws cabin, it was so much fun as always. So much snow. I loved the sledding and snow shoeing I got to do. Being with family was just fun. That night Mike and I went and got take out and some movies to watch. I didn't want to go out with friends, I just wanted to be with Mike and cuddle on the couch since he was leaving the next day. It was just how I wanted it to be.
January 1st was a roller coaster ride and I was exhausted by the end of it. Mike packed up and left for Arizona for the next 2 months for an internship he is doing at a clinic down there. He could've stayed in state, but we didn't feel that this was an opportunity he could pass up. He has worked with some really big name athletes and is having a blast with all his patients and learning so much. I am not sure if he will ever want to come home. It was so hard to say goodbye and watch his drive off, luckily I had a very busy day ahead of me.
That evening I threw a baby shower for my friend Tina. We were throwing it way earlier then planned because a lot of our friends were in town for the holiday's. It went well and we all laughed and talked late into the evening. It was so hard to go to bed alone that night and I wanted to burst into tears most of the day. I was exhausted.
I honestly feel that my Heavenly Father has really been there for me and been helping me along the way because of how well I have been doing. It is still difficult and I miss him so much and there are many times that I cry because I just wish he was here or I could have a hug or even a kiss. Just to be in his arms when I've had a bad day. I have so much more respect for the military wives our there. I am used to not seeing him a ton because of school, but at least he came home at night. I know it could be so much worse still and I know how lucky I am. No one has really checked in on me, besides kind of my family, which is a little disappointing. I thought in a sense I was more important to people then that.
This week has been a very difficult week. I have had to deal with a car situation that has been extremely frustrating and have lost all faith and confidence in a company and people. There have also been some struggles at work that were frustrating and who can forget. I know the high emotions are due to the PMS that I had this week, since I started my period on Friday, which was heartbreaking enough.
Though the week has been tough, I know I have so much to be grateful for. I get to talk to Mike every night on my way home from work, we just started skyping, he is so enjoying his internship, which is making this so much easier. I never thought I'd say it, but I am happy to be living at my parents. I have a lot of questions for God right now, especially a lot of frustrations, but I know he is looking out for me while mike is gone and I have been doing better then I'd thought I would be. I am so excited to go see him this coming weekend. Thanks to my awesome parents and the Christmas gift of two plane tickets that we got from them. I can't wait to see him and be in his arms again.
